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Accidental Scat

February 13, 2014 by Nikki Blue

Anal play– many varieties of it — are a super sweet selection on the sex menu Mr. K and I share. It has been from the beginning of our relationship. Anal activities are like the two sides of a coin that he holds in his hand. On one side I’m dominant– I facesit him, smother him, and as he begs for it, I shove my fingers into his mouth after they’ve been inside of my ass. But when he flips that coin– and he always does –I’m incredibly submissive. I crave his hands around my throat, his presence in my thoughts, and “good girl” rolling from his tongue. I never really know which way the coin will land until he tosses it. Yes, he totally tops me from the bottom.

Because we desire ass play the way we do, I’ve always been diligent in making sure my butt cave is sparkling clean for anal adventures. Plus, I’m big-time OCD. My anal cleanliness has often astounded Mr. K, though. So much that he bows to it, worships it, and doesn’t hesitate to pluck my plug from my asshole with his mouth. It’s kind of like my superpower. But during a recent round of ass lovin’, he realized the taste on his tongue was suddenly amiss. It wasn’t the mildly tart flavor he dreamed about in between visits. It was scat, y’all.

“Um, baby, you’re not clean,” he said as he examined my asshole.

Horrified, I bolted upright on the bed with a million thoughts buzzing through my brain. How did it happen? WHY did it happen? I’d done everything I was supposed to do to make sure I was clean, everything I’d always done. But what really freaked me out was that Mr. K found me unclean with his MOUTH. I feared it would ruin his taste for anal play.

Embarrassed beyond belief, I wigged out. “What? But how can that be? I’m the Queen of Clean!”

He chuckled, gargled with mouthwash– twice, and washed his hands. “You were the Queen of Clean.”

Don’t misunderstand, I know the risks of coming into contact with butt stuff. I even wrote a book about it, but until then, it had never happened to us. To be honest, I think I was far more upset about the anal derailment than Mr. K. For us, anal is intimacy in its purest form. It’s powerful, deeply felt, and even though the absence of it was noticed, the night was no less magical. The next morning he got down on his knees behind me, spread my cheeks, and flicked his tongue across my sensitive pucker. I wanted it desperately, but I panicked, afraid I wasn’t clean. He confessed he was worried too and refocused his attention to my pussy instead. It was the first time I’d held anything back from him and that alone was enough to send me into a tailspin.

In the days after, we talked and laughed about it, agreeing that one anal misadventure in two years wasn’t bad at all. I vowed I would do my best to make sure our next anal playtime would be a squeaky clean one. But the morning of his most recent visit, I woke to find I’d started my period and anxiety bloomed. It wasn’t the thought of Auntie Flo turning our sexy time into a threesome dynamic that made my stomach turn, it was the fact that anal cleansing is extra challenging during my period. I worried that anal ecstasy would once again be thwarted. I’m no quitter, though, and I persevered until I was in the clear. Although, I did tell Heather I may consider using an enema next time to make double sure I’m as clean as possible. Because I’m anal.

Still a little gunshy, I didn’t breathe easy until I heard the muffled sounds of Mr. K’s pleasure as he spread my cheeks open. Then all at once it seemed, my anal confidence returned in a rush, and I watched him in the mirror as he licked, fingered, and inhaled what he loved. The desire to feel him push into me while his skin pressed to mine was suddenly overwhelming and I begged him to fuck me, to take what was his. I needed it. We both did. And as he asked how much I’d missed Daddy’s cock deep inside my ass, he filled me with his come.

I snuggled up to Mr. K and turned on to my back to prevent butt germs from migrating to my vag, both of us feeling a sense of relief and somewhat giddy. He told me how amazing I was, joked that the Queen was back, and high-fived me for successful anal. I laughed and relaxed into his arms, realizing how silly I’d been about our little setback. Yes, it was embarrassing, but in the grand scheme of things it really was a minor incident. The simple truth is that regardless of how hard we try to control them, our bodies are fickle and tend to do whatever the fuck they want. And sometimes, shit just happens.

 

For more information on the do’s and don’ts of anal sex, read The Fundamentals of Fabulous Anal Sex.


11 Comments »

  1. Kayla Lords says:

    There’s a part of me that’s rolling in the aisles, laughing my ass off. The other part of me has the fear of what happened to you and so I am always gun-shy about anal. I never have figured out a way to feel truly clean – even with enemas.

    • Nikki Blue says:

      I take my the state of my anus very seriously when it comes to anal because I know Mr. K is going to be all up in there. Cleansing with a douche bottle and water has always worked extremely well. Plus I watch my diet carefully when Mr. K visits. I don’t eat much the day before or the morning of. Even though he finds my habit amusing, he makes sure to get food in my belly afterward. The only thing I’ve done differently is incorporate protein shakes into my diet. I’m pretty sure that’s where it went wrong. Now I know to avoid them before he visits. But seriously, Kayla, it’s a butt and there’s always a risk of trace. I’m sure you’re WAY cleaner than you’re giving yourself credit for. As long as the water runs clear, I say relax and go with it. :)

  2. Serafina says:

    You aptly described my worst fear!! well said!

  3. Something that also makes me afraid of anal play. My Master loves to fuck me in the ass, but I am often afraid for this reason….and I’m not even talking about anal/oral. But, now I’m even more afraid after previous comment because I thought an enema would definitely be the trick, but am worried about how often it is ok to use an enema?

    • Nikki Blue says:

      An anal douche and an enema are different things. A douche is nothing but body temperature water where an enema contains a laxative to stimulate a bowel movement. Neither should be used too often. Before this, I’ve never had any issues with anal douching and have always felt super clean after using one. But with anal play, the risk of coming into contact with scat is always there. With that being said, it doesn’t fall under Scat Play unless it’s specifically sought.

      I’m sure you’re far more worried about it than he is. :)

  4. I’m laughing out loud alone in my kitchen and my husband just asked if I was ok!

    I too am anal – especially about anal – and really, anal sex is the best. I used to think I was just made physically wrong to love it more than vaginal…TMI, I know, but, well, I’m here on your site… And you’re right, shit happens. Better to read about it than experience it so thank you. You’re awesome!

  5. Russil says:

    Pooping beforehand, followed by a quick soap and water cleanup, have always done the trick for the woman I am with.

    • Nikki Blue says:

      Thank you for commenting, Russil.

      I’ve given that clean routine advice in my book, The Fundamentals of Fabulous Anal Sex. And it is enough for a lot of people, but for those of us who prefer a cavity clean enough to eat out of– heh –anal douching is preferred.

  6. Suzy says:

    Haha Nikki. Just love this post. Yes people warm water…no chemicals please. I’ve never done an enema either…squirms thinking about it. And it’s so funny so many people have told me I’m weird to be female an enjoy anal sex, perhaps many are shy to admit it. I write a lot about it in my books ;)

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