You’re probably wondering how Van Halen fits into the A-Z Spanking Challenge, but trust me, it totally does.
Big hair, tight pants, and a lot of jumping around in the back seat of a beat-up Camaro… that would be me, not David Lee Roth–he had a tour bus. OK, so my hair wasn’t very big despite my best efforts and a small fortune in Aquanet. I also lived in the country where cows and pigs were my closest neighbors which didn’t help my social life. I yearned to be cool. No matter how much I listened to Motley Crue, I was thwarted by an uncommonly wholesome upbringing. I wasn’t an openly rebellious wild child. I was the good girl next door, but I learned that I couldn’t resist a bad boy. Add some Van Halen and a muscle car, and my panties were history. (Yes, smartasses, at one point in my life I wore panties.) Hair Bands will always have a special place in my heart, because they remind me of that time when every boy offered a new sexual frontier to explore. Parked on a dirt lane with only the moonlight as a guide, I began to discover my sexual self.