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  1. Kinklectic Blog Hop – Cupid did me right/wrong?

    February 9, 2015 by Heather Cole

    Cupid's-Secret---ANGEL-4g
    I have to confess, I’m not a fan of Cupid or Valentine’s Day. Apart from the chocolate. But then, I think every day should have chocolate. It’s my aversion to the romantic holiday that made it so much fun to write the short story for Kinklectic’s new anthology, Cupid’s Secrets. Thirteen Cupid-related stories by thirteen, very talented authors, and you can get it for $0.99 on Amazon HERE.

    To celebrate this auspicious release, I’m hosting a one-day blog hop to highlight Cupid and our latest release, Cupid’s Secrets. Our theme is: Cupid did me right or Cupid did me wrong. Tell us about your exploits with Cupid!

    TELL US!

    Post your experience on your blog (or comment here), and then enter the url in the link below. Don’t forget to let all your followers know where they can find more Cupid’s Secrets and some of the authors’ secrets too.

    My Cupid anecdotes are two-fold: one in real life and the other in my Cupid’s Secrets character, Soledad the librarian. First up is my real life tangle with Cupid and his tricksy arrows of love.

    Two years ago, I hosted a poly dinner party for my partners and their partners. That’s right. I invited my two boyfriends (and his wife), my girlfriend (and her boyfriend and his other girlfriend), and a Man of Interest, now known as my Sir. Confused? Yeah, join the club. You can read about the experience here: You Think The Story’s Over. Looking back at that dinner party, Dr. Hammer was the only person at that table that I hadn’t slept with. In fact, that party was only the second time we had met, but the emails and texts we had traded were already sparking what was going to evolve into a full-blown, collared, D/s relationship.

    I imagine Cupid perched on my buffet, invisible to me and laughing about the arrow he was about to sling. I thought I had it all figured out that night, and meanwhile, he was plotting for me to fall head-over-heels for the man I knew the least at that table. Flash forward seven months, give or take, and only Dr. Hammer, my dear Sir, would remain at that table. Little did I know that the title of that blog post would ring truer than I ever imagined.

    You won that round, Cupid. And I’m really glad you did.

    My character, Soledad, in I Hate You, Cupid also has her issues with Love. It’s Valentine’s Day and Soledad, a librarian with a secret past, is trying to summon the courage to tell her vampire best friend that she has a crush. Cupid visits Soledad and makes a dangerous proposition, offering her an arrow of love if she aids him. Will Soledad help Cupid and win the heart of her favorite vampire?

    Here’s a snippet:

    “You’re not going to need the gun, Soledad,” the cherub said and relaxed into the chair.

    “That’s for me to decide.”

    Working with goblins and demons made me more likely to shoot first and ask questions later. I shifted my stance so that I stood solidly on both feet. If I was going to shoot him, I wanted it to count.

    “I’m here to make your love fantasies come true. Shooting me would be premature, not to mention the fact that it won’t kill me.” He batted his eyes, the thick lashes making it look like he wore eyeliner.

    The word ‘love’ rippled through me, making the fine hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I sank back into my desk chair, the leather creaking beneath me. I was dealing with someone far above my pay grade.

    “True. Silver bullets won’t kill Love, but I bet they’ll sting like a motherfucker. How long does it take to grow back a wing?” I asked, batting my eyes in return.

    He gave me a petulant frown. “How am I supposed to help you fall in love if you insist on maiming me? I’m a god, you know, and irritating a god doesn’t usually go well for paranormals. Even those pretending to be mostly human.”

    His shirt gaped to reveal the smooth chest of an adolescent as he reached behind his ear for an unfiltered cigarette. He lit it before I could protest, flicking the gold zippo shut with a sharp, metallic click.

    “Who says that I need help with love?” I asked.

    The cherub took a long look at me, his eyes traveling from the top of my head to my heels. “One doesn’t need to be the god of love to see that you’re in desperate need,” he replied, tossing his hair back with a practiced shrug. “I’m going to offer you an epic deal, although I’m not the altruistic sort. I need to use your magic and your special authorized library access.”

     

    Buy Cupid’s Secrets to find out what Soledad decides, and for only $.99 (free if you have KU), you can have twelve more romantic, erotic, sexy, fun stories full of Valentine’s Day love and Cupid antics. Be sure to check out our other Cupid’s Secrets authors and their exploits with the feathery cherub!


  2. It’s a Party for CUPID’S SECRETS!

    February 6, 2015 by Heather Cole

     

    We’re having a party!

    And I’ve promised to behave myself. No, really. I can. I CAN BEHAVE MYSELF!

    *cough*

     

    The fabulous contributors to CUPID’S SECRETS will be throwing a release party on Facebook. There will be lots of prizes given away, free books, and fun contests.

    I’ll be hosting 12-12:30 CST! (Oh crap, I’m going to have to figure out time zones.) So stop on by and join the fun! You can watch me (mostly) behave, AND you’ll have a chance to win prizes and score a free book from me. SCORE!

    Right. Behaving…

    Here’s the party link:  See you there!

     

    Cupid's-Secret---ANGEL-4g

     


  3. Wonder Woman and Bondage

    February 5, 2015 by Heather Cole

    I have loved and idolized Wonder Woman since I was a little girl. I had Wonder Woman underoos, and my cousins and I spent hours wreaking havoc around my grandparents’ farm playing Super Friends. Even at that age I was frustrated that there were so few female superheroes. I didn’t realize that Wonder Woman began as a comic in the 1940’s or that she was into bondage, domination and submission, and spanking parties. If I had known that… well, my childhood probably would have made a lot more sense.

    Many thanks to our friend, Ashley, for finding this article about Wonder Woman’s fascinating roots.

    “If you’ve never read the comics written by Marston and drawn by Harry G. Peter, Berlatsky’s book is particularly eye-opening. It’s not just that Wonder Woman gets tied up more than other heroes (although she does) and that she does plenty of tying up herself. Marston was a psychologist by trade, and his particular views on gender, sexuality, domination, and submission (which were all, in his mind, inextricably linked) are on full display in his Wonder Woman run. There are scenes of children learning to be submissive on Paradise Island, stories where Wonder Woman fails because she isn’t dominate enough, lurid images of women trapped in cages (and, sometimes, lurid images of Steve Trevor tied up). And there are those weird spanking parties.”

     

    I’m falling in love all over again. Fetch me my magic lasso!

    Read the entire post here: Why Early Wonder Woman Was a Champion of Feminism… and Bondage over at io9.


  4. Ask Heather – Tips for a Newbie Kinkster

    February 4, 2015 by Heather Cole

    Orange candy heart that reads ask me against white background.Hi Heather,

    I just wanted to thank you and Nikki for having such an amazing blog! I am just getting into the kink world and I don’t even know where to find people to fit in. Do you have any tips for someone who’s a timid person to break into the kink community?

    Thanks so much,

    JxF

     

    Dear JxF:

    Thanks for the compliment, sugar britches, and thanks for your great question. Your timing couldn’t be better, because I’m co-writing a book with a fellow kinkster about dating kinky and all the ins and outs that go with it. Heh. In and out. The book will be out in February, but until then (I’d never make you wait that long, sweetie!), let’s chat about where the wild things are.

    You’ve probably already taken a look at our Beginner’s Kink page, and there are some good newbie Q&A on the Ask Heather page too. Especially Mr. RSVP who had to be educated in appropriate party etiquette. In the RSVP post I also mentioned a Munch, which pertains to your situation specifically, but we’ll get to that in a moment.

    Probably the easiest way for you to connect with your kinkster community is to create an account on Fetlife. There are other kinky social media sites out there, but Fetlife is my favorite because I’ve found that it’s the easiest way to connect with the goings-on in my local community. Once you have an account, you can search for groups in your geographical area. There will be discussion threads for each group, announcements, and after a little bit of searching, I’m certain you’ll discover the time and location of your local Munch.

    On Fetlife you’ll also find individual writings where kinksters share their personal musings, and that can be educational as well. Or at the very least, eye-opening and/or amusing.

    The nice thing about kinky social media, as with all social media, is that you can lurk. I don’t mean that in a creeper way either. For those of us who are shy (yes, I can be shy too in new situations) it’s nice to read about events or activities before actually attending and participating. Am I right? For example, I joined the group that hosts our local Slave Hunt and read all the threads and discussions for a year before I summoned the courage to attend a Hunt in person. Reading about something isn’t exactly like experiencing it, but research helps ease my nervousness about taking the plunge into something new.

    This leads me the most reassuring part about entering the kink community. There are events, called Munches, that are specifically designed to welcome interested people to the community. They typically take place in a vanilla setting, like a restaurant. (I like eating bacon while meeting new people.) There may be a topic of discussion for that particular meeting, or it may be a purely social, meet-n-greet. I was a bundle of butterflies when I attended my first Munch at a local seafood restaurant. The food was terrible, but the people were incredibly friendly. They didn’t hesitate to introduce themselves and encouraged me to look them up on Fetlife. And every single one of them invited me back to the next Munch.

    Another great aspect to a Munch is that if someone approaches you to play, or wants to know you better, a Munch offers a neutral place to meet and talk. In fact, I’ve offered to take a friend to a Munch, so she can start meeting other kinksters in a safe environment that holds no pressure for newbies. Shoot, you don’t have to talk to another soul if you don’t want to, although I highly encourage you to say more than “pass the salt, please.” The feeling of finding people who are like you, interested in kink, is the greatest gift. Knowing that you’re not alone in the world and “weird” for liking the things that you do… that feeling is worth its weight in gold. I encourage you to reach out and take that first step to a Munch, and trust me, everyone is nervous their first time. Every single one of us was a newbie kinkster in the beginning.

    As with all things social, it may take some exploration to find the group of people that you really “click” with. There are millions of flavors of “kink,” and as a newbie, it will take time and experiences for you to figure out where you fit best. Or rather, with which people you feel the greatest connection. It can feel intimidating when you’re new, but we won’t bite unless you ask us. Once you’ve joined a kink-friendly social media site and start searching, new worlds will open up. We’re out here, and we want to welcome you. Just take that first step and meet us halfway.

    Hugs and Good luck!

    ~Heather

    Have a burning question about BDSM, kink, or sex? (The kind of burning that doesn’t need penicillin.) Write me and ask away! heathercole@vaginaantics.com


  5. The Ultimate Guide to Sex After 50: An Interview with Joan Price

    January 30, 2015 by Heather Cole

    When we were asked if we would be interested in reading Joan Price‘s latest book, The Ultimate Guide to Sex After 50: How to Maintain – or Regain – a Spicy, Satisfying Sex Life, HELL YES was our response. But because sex and aging is such an important topic to us, we didn’t just want to review the book, which is incredible- no, no -we wanted to interview Joan. Hey, it’s how we roll. So read, enjoy, and trust me when I say you need this book. Also, if you purchase a copy directly from her website, she’ll autograph it. How sweet is that? And if you haven’t already, please check out Joan’s blog, Naked at Our Age, where she’s talking about and celebrating the joys of senior sex.

    ~Nikki

    *************************

     Dear Joan,

    Before I begin my interview questions, I have to say THANK YOU. Your words helped me uncover a piece of myself and my expectations about sex as I grow older. It has been a very interesting couple of days as I read your guide and asked my partner questions about the topics that presented themselves.

    When I started your guide about sex and aging, I considered myself outside of your target audience. I’m in my early forties, so I was “safe” from those misconceptions and myths, right? Oh was I so, so wrong. As I began reading through the myths listed at the beginning of the guide, I felt uncomfortable, like I was poking a tender place that I hadn’t known existed.

    It turned out that sex and aging is actually an issue for me. I’m a sex blogger and erotica author. My sexuality and sex life get a spotlight on a regular basis, and the idea of aging, even though I know that everyone is doing it, worries me. I’m in my forties now, but what happens in my fifties and beyond?

    The idea for Vagina Antics was born in the demise of my marriage. I was almost 40 and about to embark on a new world of dating and sex. I begged Nikki to go on the sex blogging journey with me, because what set us apart was that we are older, single mothers, who had stretch marks and an unholy love of donuts. And we were going to do all this for the second time around, and it was all new again. That identity has become central to how I see myself. So now as my body changes, and boy howdy has it in some significant ways, I feel a fear for what’s to come. Well, I felt a fear but didn’t want to admit it until I read your book.

    (And now I’m laughing at myself)

    I read your guide in parts to my partner in bed. He seemed completely surprised that I was worried about getting older and what would happen to our sex life. We are kinky and live a BDSM lifestyle, and at one point in our discussion I exclaimed, EVERYTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE. His reply was… of course it is. His solution was that we would buy even more lube and that we’d rule out the sexual positions that hurt our joints. Ah… the practicality of men. 🙂

    I really can’t thank you enough for writing your guide and agreeing to be featured on Vagina Antics. You’ve opened up a new realm of discussion for us here on the blog and personally. So thank you again, and on with my questions. (apologies in advance for my rambling)

    Hugs!

    ~Heather

    Interview Questions:

    In the beginning of your Ultimate Guide to Sex Over Fifty, you list common myths and misconceptions about sex and aging. It was this quote that made me first sit up and really listen. “I used to think that if we all banded together and refuted the ick factor, we’d change society. We’d lead the parade of women and men proclaiming our right to joyful sex, and soon everyone would acknowledge that we can be sexy at any age. We’d celebrate aging, rather than bemoaning it.”

    1.  This was a huge revelation to me, because up until this point, I had refused to even consider (or envision) sex in my sixties and beyond. I was very unconscious about this decision, and your guide was a pleasant slap in the face that I needed to wake up and pay attention. (I’m the type of woman who enjoys that type of thing.) Anyway! *cough* How does one begin looking at age and sex differently and challenging the messages that society and the media give us? Obviously buying your guide is a great place to start. But how do you revise the vision, and empower yourself, for your sex life after 50? When did you do that for yourself? Or did you always know that you’d be sexually fulfilled no matter the age?

    We start by challenging the message from society and the media that sex is the domain of the young, that we’re weird or pathetic if we’re still sexually joyful after 60, 70, 80. We do that by talking out loud about it. I don’t mean that we have to disclose intimate details to the world – just that we stand up with the sex-positive attitude, “Hey, we don’t have an expiration date. We can enjoy sex through our whole lives. And so can you.” I’ve had interviewers tell me that they don’t like to picture their aging mothers/grandmothers as sexual beings. I say, “At what age do you plan to retire your genitals?”

    No, I never thought about older age sexuality when I was young. I actually never thought much about getting older at all!

    1. Myth #3 is “If I’m not feeling the drive to have sex anymore, it’s not worth the bother, so I might as well just let it go.”

     

    Hell, I know women in their thirties that say this. Our hormones change as we age, so how do you recommend that we manage those feelings of, “this is beyond my control and happens to all women/men at my age?”

    We can acknowledge that it happens, but as you read in The Ultimate Guide to Sex after Fifty, there are many ways to address the lack of drive. We may not feel the biological drive that we felt when our hormones raged, but that’s not the only reason to enjoy sex! It’s good for pleasure, for health, for intimacy, for stress relief, for a sense of wellbeing. It makes us feel good, makes us laugh, and helps us sleep better! The point is to learn ways to overcome the sexual inertia that we may feel when the drive slows down. We can make a commitment to nurturing our sexuality.

    3.  Myth #5 is “A man who can’t have a dependable erection cannot satisfy his partner or enjoy himself.

    Preach! I started hearing apologies about “lackluster” penis behavior from men in the 40’s, and instead of worrying about what we would do in the bedroom, I felt a deep compassion for what they had deemed shameful and embarrassing. You quote sex journalist Michael Castleman and define this as “erection dissatisfaction.” In fact, you devote an entire chapter to Sex Without Erections. This is a super-sensitive area of discussion for many men. What do you recommend as the best way to begin a dialogue with your partner regarding erection dissatisfaction? There are many other options besides erection pills. Would you talk more about that to our readers? (You wrote about using a strap on and I squealed with joy!)

    I’m delighted that I made you squeal for joy! Bringing up the topic is very hard for men. If we’re partnered with a man, we can ease into the conversation by letting him know that we understand that erections aren’t dependable at our age, and that’s really okay, because we can have great sensual and sexual pleasure with hands, mouths, and sex toys. Rather than introduce the anxiety over whether the erection will happen or stay hard long enough for penetration, let’s just have sex in all these other ways.

    If this is a new relationship, the penis owner may be especially anxious. It’s helpful to say while stroking his body (all over, not just genitals, but not excluding genitals either), “Are you enjoying the sensations from my touch? Then just relax and enjoy.” Welcome him to explore how to please you without an erect penis, too. The better you can communicate what you like, the more relaxed he’ll be.

    Of course there’s a lot more in the book about sex without erections – as you said, an entire chapter!

    4.  Sex and Safety – This is a HUGE hot button for me. It should be a hot button for everyone! One would assume that barrier sex would be assumed for all ages, but it’s not. You state some scary statistics that point to the opposite in your guide. Toys need to be safe too when using them with other people! What ways do you find it’s easiest to bring up protection when dating someone new? What are your guidelines regarding keeping toys safe?

    Bring it up after the first hot kisses and wandering hands, but before the clothes are off. Being direct is simplest, like, “Let’s talk about safer sex. I always use barrier protection.” If it’s clear that sex will be happening very soon, “Let me show you the condoms I have – do you have a favorite?”

    Toys that go into more than one orifice or into more than one person’s orifice need to wear condoms and the condoms need to be changed between orifices. Wearing the FC2 receptive condom (aka female condom) is another way to stay safe when using a toy (or a penis) with more than one vagina or anus at a time, without having to change the condoms, since there’s no exchange of fluids.  

     *************************

    Hi Joan!

    I’ll get straight to the nitty gritty.

    “As a woman nearly sixty, I can say with certainty that there are days when I feel like the “hot thang” who stopped traffic back in the day – other days I feel like the detour sign.”

    I’m knocking on the door of 45 and I can totally relate to that statement. It’s so easy to let that detour sign beat us down to where we are stuck in the rut of feeling far from the sexual being we once were.

    I recently read where Erica Jagger wrote that she requested an STD workup during her well-woman visit at her gynecologist. She was stunned, as were her readers, when her female doctor told her she wouldn’t need to worry about that for much longer because women usually stop having sex around the age of 65. Why do you think doctors discount or even disapprove of sexuality in aging women?

    I’m furious about Erica’s doctor’s comment. I have a whole chapter on doctors – why they’re uninformed, how to ask questions, how to get the information you need. Doctors not only don’t get the training in older-age sexuality, but they’re people, too, with their own misconceptions and prejudices. We have to let them know that yes, we are still sexual beings, and no, it’s not okay to dismiss us.

    And finally, I’m curious. When you speak at engagements, are there a large number of men in attendance? What is the most common question you’re asked by them?

    Oh yes, men want to learn. They want to understand their own changes and their partners’ changes. I’m asked about erections, desire, how to please a long-term partner when the sex has grown stale, whether they should be worried if a partner can’t orgasm without a vibrator, how to communicate, what new things they can try, when and how to bring up sex when dating – and so much more.

    As Heather said above, thank you for speaking out so passionately about such an important topic. I’ve often wondered how I will approach sexual issues as they arise in the future, and now I know.

    *boob smooshes*

    ~Nikki

     *************************

    Thank you both for treating this topic so seriously and for including your own personal reactions. I love that the conversation is now open!

    Joan

    Joan Price headshot Joan Price Sex After 50

    “Living ‘happily ever after’ may be the stuff of fairy tale endings, but in this forthright and important book, Joan Price shows us how ‘sexy ever after’ can be a new beginning for the senior set.” —Ian Kerner, New York Times bestselling author of She Comes First

    Available for purchase here: JoanPrice.com and Amazon


  6. Cover Reveal – I Hate You, Cupid

    January 26, 2015 by Heather Cole

     

    IHateYouCupid1-REV

    I’m thrilled to announce another Kinklectic anthology out in time for Valentine’s Day! This anthology, Cupid’s Secrets, features my short story, I Hate You, Cupid. 

    I Hate You, Cupid – It’s Valentine’s Day and Soledad, a librarian with a secret past, is trying to summon the courage to tell her vampire best friend that she has a crush. Cupid visits Soledad and makes a dangerous proposition, offering her an arrow of love if she aids him. Will Soledad help Cupid and win the heart of her favorite vampire?

    The first story of Annie and Soledad can be found in the Kinklectic anthology, Secret Lives, or on Heather Cole’s Amazon Author Page in Dangerous Seduction.

    Cupid’s Secrets anthology features twelve different authors and their eclectic stories with a Valentine’s Day theme. Look for it in February!

    ~Heather


  7. We are still US

    January 11, 2015 by Heather Cole

    The weeks leading up to my trip overseas, where my sir now resided, were a whirlwind of activity. I was in a constant state of motion, cleaning up, cleaning out, and packing. But all the physical activity was a distraction to what I was feeling. I was out-of-my-body excited to see sir. We had been apart for four months, and although we connected via Skype every single day without fail, nothing could compensate for the lack of touch. His kisses, his hands on my body, the reassuring bulk of him next to me at night… I missed those things so much that I couldn’t even admit to myself how I ached to be with him.

    I was also feeling nervous. Not about the trip itself, but how we would reconnect in the flesh. And in my darker moments, I felt jealous. Jealous of a geographical location. Sir’s new city had him, and he was building a life that I could only learn about through my incessant questions during Skype. That city with its exotic customs and foreign life had consumed him almost completely. From my perspective, I was my boring old self in our boring old life that we used to share. My anecdotes from sex blogging and writing work seemed lame in comparison.

    When I stood beyond the gate in front of customs, I could only gaze at sir and smile. I told him he looked amazing, and I meant every syllable. I had to wait until we were alone in his apartment to feel his arms around me and the feeling of being held by him made me cry. Even though we both made a lot of effort to connect despite the geographical distance between us, nothing felt as exquisite as his physical embrace. It felt like I had journeyed all this way into the heart of a foreign land to finally be home. Home with him.

    The tears didn’t last long, though, and after he dried them, he gave me a quick tour which ended in the bedroom. He proceeded to claim me then, in every way possible. He filled my mouth, my pussy, and my asshole. His body dominated mine just as his will did. He smelled different, but his cock tasted and felt the same. I shed more joyful tears, mingled with the sounds of our bodies joining.

    That first day was divided into sleeping, eating, and fucking. During one of our awake times, he dug into his closet and pulled out the toys he had accrued for us. He had made a flogger from a discounted pair of nunchucks and paracord. There was a pingpong paddle, a foot long plastic shoehorn from Ikea that stung like a sonofabitch, a wooden spoon, a belt, and his favorite rattan cane. How he got that through customs, which was notorious for confiscating any items sexually related, was a mystery to me. Maybe they thought it was a camel stick? He’s going to take me to the Souk (the traditional market) and make me pick out my very own camel stick that won’t be used on any camels, only this girl’s backside.

    I fell into the familiar rituals of a spanking with wholehearted enthusiasm even as a part of me hesitated at the edge of giving myself completely. I felt like we had to be reacquainted in some ways, and I waited to see if I would find our D/s connection as strong as it once was. Now we were in his new life, a life that hadn’t made room for my physical presence yet. Everything about this world was foreign, and I worried that he would be too, or that perhaps, we wouldn’t share a love of the things we used to. Eventually I told my monkey mind to shut up, so I could be present. I trusted sir with my body and heart, and I had to trust that my unease would vanish the more time we spent with one another.

    Sir had me suck his cock while he hit me with his belt. The pleasure I took from sucking and running my tongue along his shaft was punctuated by the licks of pain from the leather. I gasped around him, trying to focus only on what I could control:  my mouth, tongue, and lips. Eventually he pulled me up beside him where I cuddled into his side. He stroked my cheek and looked intently at me.

    “Did you like it when I hit you?” he asked.

    “Yes, Daddy,” I replied with a small smile.

    “What kind of girl likes being hurt like that?”

    It was a question that he had asked me in various ways ever since the beginning of our relationship. And staring into his beautiful hazel eyes, the answer practically exploded out of me.

    “This girl loves when you hurt her, Daddy. It’s because of you that I love it so much. The pain goes hand in hand with trust, and it moves us beyond our defenses. Together.”

    Lust swept through me as my words unlocked the last gate around my heart. I wanted him all over again, and I wanted him to consume me. This was our connection in action. This is what kept me at his feet for the long months that we could only talk through our computers. The fire that blazed beneath my skin was lust for this man, love, and a trust so deep that I couldn’t feel whole without it.

    I kissed him hard and pressed my body along the length of his. He pushed me gently back and thrust his fingers between my legs. The orgasm hit me immediately, and I cried out as my fingernails dug into his arm. A second orgasm followed on the heels of the first, and I squirted on to the sheets. Daddy laughed with delight and fingerbanged me to a third orgasm.

    I couldn’t believe that I had squirted. It had been so long since I had done so, and when he asked me about it later, all I could think of was how strongly I felt about us. That was what inspired and reassured me. Despite all the time apart, our bond was still powerful, and we were still us.

     


  8. Say Goodbye to 2014

    January 1, 2015 by Heather Cole

    2015-2

    Happy New Year, y’all!

    I must confess that I’m not sorry AT ALL to usher 2014 out the damn door. Last year was a real bite in the ass for me in significant ways. The spring of 2014 brought my mama’s diagnosis of uterine cancer. Then in July, my daughter underwent successful open heart surgery. August was burned into my brain, because my sir left for a three-year work contract overseas. The three most important people to me all suffered. Hey, 2014, KISS MY ASS!

    The year wasn’t all bad, of course. I published three books, one of which went into an anthology with incredible authors, and I have even more expected to be published in 2015. Last year meant broadening my writing horizons and making new friendships in the blogging/author world. I also had some amazing sexual adventures with my sir before he left, and to my surprise and delight, those adventures didn’t cease when the geographical distance between us increased. Don’t worry. Y’all will hear all about them. Well, most of them. This girl does need her secrets.

    In case you missed them, here are three of my favorite posts of 2014:

    H is for How – A post written by my beloved sir in response to a reader’s question. I swoon all over again reading his words. *blissful sigh*

    She Stabbed Me, and I Bubbled – My first experience with needles. Reading this again makes me grin. It was SO MUCH FUN!

    Heather Orgasms in Public – I did! While hypnotized! In front of university students! (I’ll stop exclaiming now)

    Looking back at the year behind us, I’m able to see the growth and the gifts that arrived on the heels of heartache and worry. I was tested in ways that I couldn’t have foreseen, and I think I’m now in a better place than when the year began. Thank you, dear readers, for coming along for the ride. There are so many good things to come. Heh. Come…

    KISSES!

    ~Heather


  9. Top 100 Sex Bloggers of 2014

    December 22, 2014 by Heather Cole

    Top-Sex-Blogger-2014

    Every year those of us in the sex blogging community wait with joyful anticipation for Rori’s list of Top 100 Sex Bloggers over at Between My Sheets.  Making her list is the one of the best ways that we know to celebrate this holiday season. It’s a feather in our cap that our sex blogging contemporaries like us, and even more importantly, that our readers are enjoying our content as well. To our combined amazement (Nikki called me at 11:00 pm last night to tell me the news, and my first thought was that her vibrator had busted–you know, a real emergency) we not only made the list, but we scored in the top ten. Thank you from the bottom of our naughty, sexy hearts, Rori! We love all y’all. *boobsmoosh*

    Check out the other top contenders below, and see the full list at Between My Sheets:

    1. Girl on the Net
    2. JoEllen Notte, The Redhead Bedhead
    3. Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan, Oh Joy Sex Toy
    4. Nikki & Heather, Vagina Antics
    5. BD Swain, learning how to tell you
    6. Jillian Boyd, Lady Laid Bare
    7. Cheeky Minx, Love Hate Sex Cake
    8. Lilly, Dangerous Lilly
    9. Dr. NerdLove, Paging Dr. NerdLove
    10. Hyacinth Jones, A Dissolute Life Means

  10. Conversations From the Workplace

    December 20, 2014 by Heather Cole

    I worked with a woman who I would classify as a dominant personality. I had lots of evidence to support my determination as I observed her in action, her confidence skillfully overriding those more hesitant or reluctant. She classified herself as a dominant depending on the  situation, and when we worked together, that’s the side she chose to present most often. She was charming in her absolute certainty of action around the workplace, so you can imagine my delight when she shared her stories about being a submissive. The dichotomy between who she was professionally and who she played with in her personal life appeared to be polar opposites. The more time I spent in the kink community, however, the more I came to understand that these two sides often belonged to the same coin.

    I listened to her submissive tales with wide eyes, my jaw dropping when I saw the photos of the predicaments he placed her in, bound and immobile with her breath restricted. Her Dominant had a wide sadistic streak that made my toes curl with trepidation. My friend, though, embraced this in a way that made sparks fly and my panties drop. I might not have felt compelled to do some of the things they chose to experience, but I sure as fuck loved hearing about them. I was dying to hear about their latest visit together, of course, and this is what she told me.

    They decided to order pizza after work one night. She was at his place, and while they were waiting for the pie to be delivered, they began messing around in the bedroom. One thing led to another and she ended up naked and on all fours. He bound her in place and lowered a blindfold over her eyes.

    The doorbell rang.

    She said she waited, listening for his footsteps to enter the room again. It was quiet. Suddenly a cock pushed at her lips. She pulled back as much as she was able, still unable to see, and tried to make sense of what was happening. She tasted latex and knew there had to be a condom, but she didn’t see why he needed it.

    “I don’t understand,” she said.

    “Be quiet. Do what you’re told,” he replied.

    She did, and she did it willingly. She started fellating the cock, and after a few moments, a second man entered her from behind. She was spit-roasted, caught between her Dominant and a stranger, none of whom she could see. She said it was one of the most erotic things that had ever happened to her. Or maybe that was what was going through my head as I listened.

    The man using her mouth had an orgasm, and after he pulled out, she heard him say, “I have to finish delivering the pizzas.”

    As soon as she told me this, I burst into laughter. It turned out that the pizza delivery man was a college buddy of her Dominant. It was like a Penthouse Forum letter come to life. I have to confess that I felt a flash of envy. Delivery suddenly took on a whole new meaning.

    I wonder if he took that blowjob in lieu of a tip.