Jason Darrick is an author and fellow contributor to FELT TIPS: the world’s first anthology devoted to office theme erotica. (To be released 12/12/12) Jason is a wicked word slinger, blogger and musician who has been gracious enough to share his tales of international lovin.’ His new works encompass his love of horror, occult, bizarro, fetish and kink fiction and film. A single father who looks hot in a kilt, Jason divides his time between writing and raising his 3 year-old daughter. In his spare time, he spends a great amount of time and energy devoted to reading, reviewing and his other lifelong passion, pro wrestling.
“French is the language of love.” At some point or another, I’m willing to bet that we’ve all heard that. You’ve probably also heard “Italians make great lovers” or “Latinos are muy caliente in the sheets”. I’m also trying to get “words of an author will make you quiver” going, but that’s a topic for another time.
Language is obviously not universal, in the sense that even the most learned soul couldn’t possibly understand every word spoken on this ball of dirt. Luckily for us, we don’t have to. Lust has a language all its own. Whether it be a simple English “fuck me”, or the slightly less abrupt French of “je te veux”, the language of lust is as diverse as the Kama Sutra, and can be just as sexy.
I’ve had the pleasure of getting naked with women of French, Mexican, Peruvian, British, Irish and German descent. If you’re keeping score, that means I’ve heard some form of “let’s have sex” in four different languages. How do they compare? Let’s find out.
My time with a German girl was my first introduction to rough sex. Though she was transplanted and lived not too far away from me, she was very adamant about keeping her linguistic skills up to par. This experience is lowest on my list even though it involves rough sex because the time we spent talking was limited. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it when she said “fick mich”, which is pronounced pretty much as you imagine it. It was raw and animalistic, just like the sex we shared.
The English-speaking women were obviously able to tell me exactly what they wanted in a manner that was mutually understandable. I’m going to assume that most of our readers understand English, so I really won’t bore you with details. If you want the details, friend me on FetLife. (Hint, they involve having a woman sing Con Te Partiro by Sarah Brightman to me whilst bound by rope.)
All things French enamor Alyssa, but I have to be honest, my second favourite experiences have been with French women. Now, the movies I’ve watched have got the stereotypical French woman down. Whether from Quebec or Paris, the women get what they want, often without asking. I mentioned “je te veux”, which is simply “I want you”, but when said with a sultry voice with a proper accent, my clothes disappear. When I got comfortable with my French lovers, I heard things like “je dois te faire” (“I have to do you”), “C’est a toi, Cherie” (“Whatever you like, dear”) and the slightly more vulgar “Je veux goûter votre sperme” (“I want to taste your cum”). I don’t think I’ve ever been more eager to oblige a request than when I heard that.
For those keeping score, there is one request that I’ve heard that made me almost too weak to fulfill it: “llena mi culo”. I’ll get to the translation in just a bit, but for those unfamiliar, those words are in Spanish. I absolutely adore Latinas, and as I mentioned, am lucky enough to say that I’ve been with both Mexican and Peruvian women. I’ve yet to travel to Spain, but that’s a different topic. Spanish can be a harsh language (don’t piss off Latinas), but it can also be incredibly sensuous (or really dirty if you know what that saying above means.) To be clear, I cannot speak Spanish outside of a polite greeting, but when I’m with a woman who knows what to do with her tongue (linguistically speaking, pervs) I just lose myself. “Te quiero” (“I want you”), “quiero hacer cosas malas” (“I want to do bad things”) and the first quote “llena mi culo” (“fill my ass”) are all examples of things I’ve been fortunate/perverted enough to have had the pleasure of hearing.
I’m a lucky man, no doubt about it at all. I hope you’ve all learned a little something, depravity is something that I enjoy sharing. I also enjoy sharing the pages of Felt Tips with each of the fine purveyors of smut that you’ve met and will meet. Soft kisses to Heather and Nikki for allowing me to play in their dungeon, and a very warm ass-grab to Alyssa for teaming up with me this week.
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